We woke up in L.A. That’s a good start. Actually, we’re in a nice pad over behind the Hollywood Bowl. Underpants not allowed.
In acting like we’re writing this blog all day long, we time stamp the entries. It’s a nice illusion. You probably think we’re working hard over here to report in several times a day. Bullshit. We actually jot down the happenings as soon as we can. Since I do all the driving (over 5000 miles so far), and have to deal with the cinemas, selling merch, doing Intros and Q&As for both Hell on Wheels and Total Badass and partying-balls as well, I have far less time to scrawl out the stories. With that in mind, allow me to allow Chad do most of the jabbering about L.A. It don’t hurt none that he’s funny.
The screening at USC was arguably the highpoint of the tour for Total Badass. There was a big crowd, and most of them stuck around for about 45 minutes of question and answering. Brazoswood’s own Ric Frazier was there, with a huge mass of dreadlocks on his head.
Bob and I went out after the movie with a younger couple, Brian and Gianna, who had just moved up from San Diego to go to film school at USC and Santa Cruz, respectively. I know it sounds corny, but it was kind of cool for me to think Bob and I could possibly impress something on the people we’ve been meeting along the way. Hanging out with Brian and Gianna was probably the flagship moment of this particular sentiment. Sometime around midnight, I got a call from Austin’s own Chepo Pena, who is out here on a tour of his own. From there on out, things in Los Angeles got apeshit in a hurry, so pay attention.
First, we all went down and met Chepo at “Jumbo’s Clown Room”, which I immediately started and still have not stopped calling “Operation Dumbo Drop”. That would be a lot funnier if the girls who dance at Operation Dumbo Drop were as ugly as the rumors we ran into said they were. The night we were there, the girls were not only fine as hell, but many of them were way better dancers than your typical stripper. I’m talking about gymnasts and acrobats and shit, ok? Of course, then again, strippers take out their tits and show you their buttholes for dollars while the girls at Operation Dumbo Drop remain clothed. As a person who goes to titty bars, I noticed that the fact that these girls don’t get naked causes them to pay a lot more attention to the sexier details of their clothing. A stripper never has to really worry about her clothes, because she’s not going to be using them that much. Unfortunately, Operation Dumbo Drop strictly forbids photography of any kind on its premises, so all I was able to film was every stripper in the club that night giving a happy birthday orgy dance to one of their brethren (SFW):
Right next door to Operation Dumbo Drop was a karaoke bar, and an oriental one at that. It turned out to be Thai, but before we asked and found out for sure, we all made guesses. I said Cambodian, Chepo said Korean, Brian and Gianna said Thai, Chepo changed his to Thai, and then Bob said Thai, but followed that up with “Yep, Taiwanese.” Things started out a little shaky, and I paid five dollars for a beer that clearly said $3.75 right on the fucking menu. We sat down in the middle of the restaurant and watched people sing pop Thai karaoke songs with a live band backing them when Chepo realizes that it’s just like his live karaoke band, The Dead Motley Sex Maidens. I’m not trying to oversell Chepo here, ok? In the interest of full disclosure, Chepo wrote the first ever review that anyone ever did about me as a performer. It was way the hell back in the Zeppoli’s days over on West Campus, in about 1992 or 1993 and I’m pretty sure Chepo was publishing his own ‘zine. He did a review of my band DKB, and said something along the lines of I was half Jesus, half Charles Manson and one of the greatest performers of all times. It was nothing I let go to my head, I assure you. In fact, I was actually more pleased with the fact that he had conversely wrote a scathing review about the band Spill, our good buddies from Lake Jackson, and concentrated his ire almost fully on long time friend, Kevin Seay. Anyway, I’ve known Chepo ever since and he of course needs no introduction as a performer in Austin, but what happened next has to be one of his career highlights. He went up and asked the band if they did any songs in English that he could sing along to, and they actually agreed upon doing “La Bamba” in Spanish, so you’ve got all kinds of races flying around here. Chepo brought the house down so hard with “La Bamba” that the band just sort of held him hostage and went straight into “Twist and Shout” and “I Saw Her
Standing There” before they were done with him. Is this all captured on film? You bet it is:
We had a great fucking time this night, and especially in the Thai place. By the end of the night, all cultural reservations had been abandoned, as evidenced by this video:
If you got a particular kick out of this part of our evening like I did, then you might enjoy the following three videos of real Thais doing real Thai karaoke:
If you got a particular kick out of this part of our evening like I did, and you’re a fan of Ed Hall and Pong, then you might enjoy the following video of a real Thai Gary Chester doing real Thai Gary Chester karaoke: